Game Recap: Isles 4, Canes 3 F; Pou-LIN Dynasty

Out sick from work today. Feels like the flu. literally bed ridden all day. DTD with Flu like symptoms. I’m a gamer tho. Dont fret.

Okposo back to Grabs-Nielsen, PAP to the Dynamic duo of Tavarizard and Moulson Golden.

Isles open the scoring.

The Okposolypse.

Isles get sloppy. It is 1-1. Some random flushing toilet scored. Suter?

Tlusty scores seconds after nudie photo time … i mean intermission.Tap in. 2-1, Flushing toilets.

Holy Jeebus. THE TAVARIZARD. Wowza.

The Great Dane, moments later, from Tavarizard. Danish Superprince on fire with new contract.

Sekera? roofs onethat came to him  off the ref. Bang. Tie game end, 2.

Seconds into the third, TAVARES IS MAGICAL. LIKE DR. DOOM RIDING UNICORN ON A RAINBOW.

That’s your final. 4-3. Ho hum. 3 points for JT.

Some asshole Caroliner Flushing Toilet shoots it well after the whistle. John Morrison? Who? Doors? What? Anyhow. Matt Martin goes raging bull at him, Stupid ugly Eric Staal And some other Flushing toilet make it 3 on 1. Then Skinner comes over, now firmly safe with a 4 on 1 advantage and throws a suckerpunch. And then Pandolfo sees this and the crafty veteran pool cues him with the buttend. Hilarious.

4-3 Good guys.

Win, Poulin, who is approaching Flawless Prince status.

3 points for PAP, who WANTS THE MONEY. GIVE HIM THE MONEY.

OMG. FORGOT: TRAVIS HAMONIC RESUMES SKATING MONDAY. THEY SHOWED HIM ON THE TEEVEES. I AM CONTENTED.

Stars: 1. TAVARIZARD JT91, 2. PAP, 3. POULIN

please move El Nino to third line, Rolston to the end of time and Haley to 4th line.

Oh, BTW: I didnt recap the Florida, St. Louis or Montreal shit shows. I will recap when we lose. If we show up. If they don’t, I won’t, or I just go scorched earth and say hurtful things about everything, so why bother?

PS: Sweeping Kirk Mueller is wonderbar.

GM RECAP: Isles 2 Kings 1 F/OT – Oh Captain, My Captain!

Yes a little Whitman for the masses. Feel educated. Ladies and gents. Today was a day!As Ice Cube said, it was a Good day. Wow, Warrior Poets Walt Whitman and Ice Cube in one Paragraph. Top that!

Took my boy @Jrkeating to the game in a belated birthday celebration.

Not a bad one at all.

KENNY JONSSON Day. YESSSSSSS KJ. The Eight Captain in Islanders History joins the pantheon of Isles legends in the team HOF (Still missing Tonelli and Lafontaine!), classy speech by the tux clad Swede. Pictures abound on my twitter.

Words from teammate and Isles GM Garth Snow, fellow Swede Bobby Nystrom, STE-VE WE-BB! (I think Webby crushed the cameraman), former HC (HOW DID WE FIRE YOU?) Peter Laviolette, and BE STILL MY FLUTTERING HEART, ADRIAN AUCOIN.

Isles dominate first 10 minutes. Grabner pots one from The Okposolypse and That playmaking phenom, Mark Eaton.

Kings take control and well, own the next 30 minutes, getting the equalizer off a scrum in front.

We’ve entered the thunderdome portion of the NHL season where on ice assault is overlooked.

That’s fine. Isles need to realize this and up their truculence. If only they had someone like Mike Haley on call. Haley had a hat trick, tonight. Not a Mike Haley hat trick (3 Fights, 1 Goal), but a honest to god Hat Trick Hat Trick. Call Him Up. Demote Wallace. STAT.

Happy Birth-averservery, Max Talbot. Last February 11th was a  wonderful present for you, da?

Anyway, on to the third period. Looked like Isles would have to shorten the bench when NHL leading Hitter, The Staplegun, Matt Martin crushed a King (wanna say Brown?), but bounced his own head off the glass.

He returned to a thunderous ovation. Several bloggers and media members called that “courageous”. Don’t do that, because it implies that anyone who returns from a concussion is chickensh-t. And we don’t want to pressure people with BRAIN INJURIES to rush back into action. That’s how they die.

Anyhow, the Isles dominate the 3rd, but can’t solve Moulson’s Bro in Law, Quickman.

TO OVVERRRTIMME:

The 13th Captain in team history decided to honor the 8th and fellow blue liner with one of the most gorgeous end to end rush OT Winners you’ll ever see.

Amazing. As Warner Wolf would say, lets go to the videotape:

http://video.nhl.com/videocenter/console?hlg=20112012,2,818

(Fast fwd to three minute mark if you are ADD addled like me).

Actual Butchie greatness on the call:

“Hello Martinez. Goodbye Martinez. Game Over.”

The Goal in the Captains own words:

“(Moulson) gave me the puck, I just skated toward four of their guys and tried to spread them. I made a little move, cut back and all of a sudden I was in front of the goalie and decided to score.”

Please Mark, Oh Captain, Oh Decider, Decide to score more often.

Back to .500. Tremendous memories via the Captain and the Former captain. What better way to honor them then with this shirt from our friends the talented ladies over at@PucksAndPixels listing the 10 most important Isles Captains ever: http://skreened.com/pucksandpixels/ampersand-islanders-captains?direction=asc&field=order&query=&start=0&count=20 (I purchased the Slate Gray, black font looks nice on it).

Now that the obligatory cheap plug is out of the way: ONWARD!!!!

Team is playing really well right now. Keep it up and we may be forced to ADD at the deadline.

NP:

EDIT:

“Was Vinny scolded by Overzealous Parents during a day game?” update:

NOOOO, maybe the Mayans are on to something. I Behaved. One rendition of “If you know the Rangers Suck Clap Your Hands” got some looks (seriously, screw you people!), other than that, only wayward glance for a LUSTY booing of Charles Wang’s name during HOF Ceremony.

The Happiest of Happy days: Isles 1, Flyers 0 F/SO + MUCH MORE

The day started with Prop 8 getting struck down in Cali.

SUCCKKKKK IT Rick Santorum.

I was driving home from class ramping it up for a visit to the den of evil, Philadelphia.

That’s when my twitter feed blew up. 4  years. 11 Million. Frans Nielsen, a career Islander WILL REMAIN. OUTFUCKINGSTANDING.

Geeked about it.  He’s my fave current Isle.

The Isles broke the Flyers streak of utter dominance last time out. This time, I oddly felt good. Even without the Mighty Hammer (Who shall be back from a broken nose in 2 weeks).

First Period:

Flyers lead the shot battle 10-7. Everything else dead even. Hits, Faceoffs, chances, all that.

The latter 40 saw Reese appear to badly injure his knee. 5 D left. One was Aaron Ness, making his NHL Debut for the injured Hamonic.

The Philadelphia Flyers averaged almost a shot a minute from then on out, by Evgeni Nabokov tapped the goalline with his stick and said NONE SHALL PASS.

45s through the end of O/T.

Shootout time. Frans first.

THE FRESHLY MINTED 11 MILLION DOLLAR DANISH BACKHAND OF JUDGEMENT… SCOREEESSS.

Danny Briere…. TOE SAVE NABBY KOV.

91, THE BEST IN THE WORLD… HOLLA. 2-0 Isles in the skills contest.

Wayne Simmonds MUST score or Its over…

ITS OVER. ISLES WIN.

ISLES REACH .500

HO-HUM. ANOTHER WIN IN PHILLY.

NYI now sit 4. games out with 3 games in hand. Just sayin’.

Isles lock up another core piece at a hometown discount. Shocker.

Garth Snow says “We Take Care Of Our Own.”

One of the best Isles nights in a long time.

Team surging. Shrugging off injury after injury. Fighting, clawing toward the impossible dream.

Finally get back to .500, which like it or not is a measure of respectability in this league.

Locked up one of our home grown beloved guys on the cheap.

Beat a hated rival in their barn…

 

 

Believe….

Game Recap: Sabres 4 Isles 3 F/Shootout

Sorry, this will be brief.

Watching Alaskan State Troopers. Its fucking hilarious.

Bad turnover by Weber to Grabner who has become something of a Sabre killer. To Nielsen, Bang, 1-0.

Isles give it right back as somebody passes to Hamonic who was half way on the bench.

No matter, Bailey buries one shorthanded. Sort of. They officially say it’s EVSG, but Nino got his +1 in the Penalty Box.

Nielsen again. 3-1 Good guys after 20.

Kaleta challenges Martin and that was unwise.

otherwise uneventful 20 until Sabres score in final minute.

Again, Isles check out in dying seconds of a period.

3-2 after 2.

And then it went to shit.

Hamonic took a puck to the face. Bleeding way way too much. Scary. Appears to be the nose. Can’t be certain, but looks to be shattered. Hope to Dog thats all it is.

Back to Back Nights, 5 Dmen, we let Stafford walk in and roast Al.

3 up.

Last 5 minutes of regulation and all of OT, Isles Carry play. Ryan Miller slams the door.

Hockey ends 3 a side.

Sabres take the skills comp after Miller snuffs the danish backhand!

My Stars: Nielsen (NYI), Miller (BUF).

Gerbe is a tough skilled little bastard. Wants every call, works officials. Nino laughed at him. Funny exchange.

Pat Kaleta is a cheapshotting walking buttplug. I hate him.

Politics score: Santorum, lol.

Who thinks Rick Santorum is in this besides Rick Santorum? He’s deader than the dodo.

Romneycare vs Obamacare is coming. It’s inevitable.

Last question: Why would any Sabre fan still wear the slug? WHHYYYYYY

Im out.

Later skaters.

Beat the Flyers Tuesday and reach .500, please?

I leave you bwith adorable baby Frans Niewlsen.

OMG SO CUTE GREAT DANE…

…PLEASE RE-SIGN.

 

Game Recap: Isles 2 Sens 1 (OT) MARK EATON LOL WUT?

Ah, the Ottawa Condom wrappers.

Real talk here, Ottawa. Why is Alfredsson “one of the classiest men in the NHL”? Am i the only person that remembers this? Really?

 

Fucking Garbage.

Glad you never won a cup. Nice fake banners from the cro magnon period, Sens.

Garbage.

ANYWAY!

ON TO THE RECAPPING.

The first period: Whistle Whistle Whistle. Isles Shot. Whistle. Lather rinse repeat.

Second period: Whistle. baack and forth play. Isles power play. Nada. Sens PP. No Sale. Isles PP… Sens Shorty by some guy just before end of period. MOTHERFUCKER. I think i rebroke my toe kicking my desk.

THE FINAL STANZA (MAYBE): MATTYYY (WHO DA MAN, GINA? YOU THE MAN…)….MARTIN! From MV-PA.

Teams trade chances. Another big Isles PK. Tavares and Okposo get posts.

Alfie still a bitch.

To OOOVVERRTTIMME (THE FINAL, FINAL STANZA):

EATON. LOL. EATON. IN HIS 600th GAME. FIRST GOAL IN 121 games. From Jurcina. Backhand spinorama. Of Course! Obvious goal is obvious.

Secondary helper to MV-PA.

ISLES 2, SENS 1 final.

Suck it, Alfie.

 

 

 

Game Recap: Tavares 4, NonJT Isles 1 Canes 2

Hahahahaha.

TO THE RECAPPING!

NEW YORK ISLANDERS @ Team With Flushing Toilet logo that should still be named HARTFORD WHALERS!

The best Flushing Toilet is Cam Ward. I love him. He is Billy Smith II. I hate Eric Staal, and stupid Sutter spawn that Doug Weight knocked out.  Skinner and Faulk are cute, but they play for KIRK PIECE OF SHIT LOWLIFE MUELLER {/Iron_Shiek_Voice}, SO STFU.

TO THE GAME:

MV-PA from Tavares. Powerplay is cash money. Its why Biased NHL wouldnt give us any against stupid Leafs.

Moulson from PA and Streiter. Moneies on the Powerplay.

Carolina roars back on nifty backhgand roofjob and a ridiculous goal where a guy was laying on Pouuuulliinnnn. Stupid Skinner.

Matt Martin staplegunning bitches. Travis Hamonic holds the hammer that says on it ‘Whosoever Holds This Hammer, If He Be Worthy, shall possess the power of the Mighty Thor!”. And Poulin is downright nasty. I love.

2-2 game… getting late, momentum all Flushing Toilets. And then Tavares happens. And then Tavares happens Again. And then Tavares happens again again.

1 helper setting up Okposolypse Now, 2 hammer jobs from N HL’s 4th leading scorer, the Marginally Talented JT91.

Who is third in the league in Game Winning Goals, despite not being clutch as Neil Greenberg explained to us.

Wondrous win.

John Buccigross has referred to Tavares as ‘Filthy Mittens”.

I shall call him “Unmitigated Splendor.”

I leave you with these:

“BAH GOD KING, THAT’s JOHN TAVARES’ MUSIC!”

Game Notes TML 4, Isles 3. Final / OT

I…. ah. I’ve de-raged.

For now.

BUT FUCK YOU YOU FUCKING COCK TEASING REFEREES. I HATE YOU. YOURE FUCKING AWFUL. DIE.

Anyhow,

Isles blew 2-0 lead. Didn’t get 1 powerplay gainst the dirtiest clean team I’ve ever seen.

Tavares called the referee a fucking joke. The referee didnt laugh.

Good on JT91.

For a tough guy, Dion Phaneuf is the biggest pussy I have ever seen.

Anyhow, http://t.co/WXb95ycJ that is all you need to know about what the referees saw in this game. That led to the GWG in ot.

Clark McArthur is a chump and had like 45 goals against us tonight.

 

JT91 opened scoring on a BEASTLY feed from The Okposolypse.

Bails made it 2-love on a feed from FLAWLESS PRINCE MARTIN, shorty slice.

Gustavson kept everything else out through vodoo magic until PAP popped one in during the dying seconds.

Blown call again in OT that i showed the pic of = game over.

Whatever. Postgamed at Friendly’s. Brownie Sundae = sleepy Vinny.

Pregame went to the team store, bought sick ass practice jersey (Orange! REMINDS ME OF THE GREAT PUMPKIN JERSEY!) for $65 on sale from $99, by the time we got to seats they had sold so many that they raised the price to $70. HA. HAHAHA. The clerk said “You bought a jersey, go over there to get a random player auto. I GOT TAVARES. TAVARES. TAVARES. TAVARES. JT91.

I got home and took the DiPi / Campoli auto off my wall. I hate you Campoli, you malcontent sack of shit. Rick, I love you. Retire.

And that’s that. Anyone want this DP/Campoli pic?