Game Recap: Isles 4, Canes 3 F; Pou-LIN Dynasty

Out sick from work today. Feels like the flu. literally bed ridden all day. DTD with Flu like symptoms. I’m a gamer tho. Dont fret.

Okposo back to Grabs-Nielsen, PAP to the Dynamic duo of Tavarizard and Moulson Golden.

Isles open the scoring.

The Okposolypse.

Isles get sloppy. It is 1-1. Some random flushing toilet scored. Suter?

Tlusty scores seconds after nudie photo time … i mean intermission.Tap in. 2-1, Flushing toilets.

Holy Jeebus. THE TAVARIZARD. Wowza.

The Great Dane, moments later, from Tavarizard. Danish Superprince on fire with new contract.

Sekera? roofs onethat came to him  off the ref. Bang. Tie game end, 2.

Seconds into the third, TAVARES IS MAGICAL. LIKE DR. DOOM RIDING UNICORN ON A RAINBOW.

That’s your final. 4-3. Ho hum. 3 points for JT.

Some asshole Caroliner Flushing Toilet shoots it well after the whistle. John Morrison? Who? Doors? What? Anyhow. Matt Martin goes raging bull at him, Stupid ugly Eric Staal And some other Flushing toilet make it 3 on 1. Then Skinner comes over, now firmly safe with a 4 on 1 advantage and throws a suckerpunch. And then Pandolfo sees this and the crafty veteran pool cues him with the buttend. Hilarious.

4-3 Good guys.

Win, Poulin, who is approaching Flawless Prince status.

3 points for PAP, who WANTS THE MONEY. GIVE HIM THE MONEY.

OMG. FORGOT: TRAVIS HAMONIC RESUMES SKATING MONDAY. THEY SHOWED HIM ON THE TEEVEES. I AM CONTENTED.

Stars: 1. TAVARIZARD JT91, 2. PAP, 3. POULIN

please move El Nino to third line, Rolston to the end of time and Haley to 4th line.

Oh, BTW: I didnt recap the Florida, St. Louis or Montreal shit shows. I will recap when we lose. If we show up. If they don’t, I won’t, or I just go scorched earth and say hurtful things about everything, so why bother?

PS: Sweeping Kirk Mueller is wonderbar.

Advertisements

GM RECAP: Isles 2 Kings 1 F/OT – Oh Captain, My Captain!

Yes a little Whitman for the masses. Feel educated. Ladies and gents. Today was a day!As Ice Cube said, it was a Good day. Wow, Warrior Poets Walt Whitman and Ice Cube in one Paragraph. Top that!

Took my boy @Jrkeating to the game in a belated birthday celebration.

Not a bad one at all.

KENNY JONSSON Day. YESSSSSSS KJ. The Eight Captain in Islanders History joins the pantheon of Isles legends in the team HOF (Still missing Tonelli and Lafontaine!), classy speech by the tux clad Swede. Pictures abound on my twitter.

Words from teammate and Isles GM Garth Snow, fellow Swede Bobby Nystrom, STE-VE WE-BB! (I think Webby crushed the cameraman), former HC (HOW DID WE FIRE YOU?) Peter Laviolette, and BE STILL MY FLUTTERING HEART, ADRIAN AUCOIN.

Isles dominate first 10 minutes. Grabner pots one from The Okposolypse and That playmaking phenom, Mark Eaton.

Kings take control and well, own the next 30 minutes, getting the equalizer off a scrum in front.

We’ve entered the thunderdome portion of the NHL season where on ice assault is overlooked.

That’s fine. Isles need to realize this and up their truculence. If only they had someone like Mike Haley on call. Haley had a hat trick, tonight. Not a Mike Haley hat trick (3 Fights, 1 Goal), but a honest to god Hat Trick Hat Trick. Call Him Up. Demote Wallace. STAT.

Happy Birth-averservery, Max Talbot. Last February 11th was a  wonderful present for you, da?

Anyway, on to the third period. Looked like Isles would have to shorten the bench when NHL leading Hitter, The Staplegun, Matt Martin crushed a King (wanna say Brown?), but bounced his own head off the glass.

He returned to a thunderous ovation. Several bloggers and media members called that “courageous”. Don’t do that, because it implies that anyone who returns from a concussion is chickensh-t. And we don’t want to pressure people with BRAIN INJURIES to rush back into action. That’s how they die.

Anyhow, the Isles dominate the 3rd, but can’t solve Moulson’s Bro in Law, Quickman.

TO OVVERRRTIMME:

The 13th Captain in team history decided to honor the 8th and fellow blue liner with one of the most gorgeous end to end rush OT Winners you’ll ever see.

Amazing. As Warner Wolf would say, lets go to the videotape:

http://video.nhl.com/videocenter/console?hlg=20112012,2,818

(Fast fwd to three minute mark if you are ADD addled like me).

Actual Butchie greatness on the call:

“Hello Martinez. Goodbye Martinez. Game Over.”

The Goal in the Captains own words:

“(Moulson) gave me the puck, I just skated toward four of their guys and tried to spread them. I made a little move, cut back and all of a sudden I was in front of the goalie and decided to score.”

Please Mark, Oh Captain, Oh Decider, Decide to score more often.

Back to .500. Tremendous memories via the Captain and the Former captain. What better way to honor them then with this shirt from our friends the talented ladies over at@PucksAndPixels listing the 10 most important Isles Captains ever: http://skreened.com/pucksandpixels/ampersand-islanders-captains?direction=asc&field=order&query=&start=0&count=20 (I purchased the Slate Gray, black font looks nice on it).

Now that the obligatory cheap plug is out of the way: ONWARD!!!!

Team is playing really well right now. Keep it up and we may be forced to ADD at the deadline.

NP:

EDIT:

“Was Vinny scolded by Overzealous Parents during a day game?” update:

NOOOO, maybe the Mayans are on to something. I Behaved. One rendition of “If you know the Rangers Suck Clap Your Hands” got some looks (seriously, screw you people!), other than that, only wayward glance for a LUSTY booing of Charles Wang’s name during HOF Ceremony.

Game Recap: Isles 2 Sens 1 (OT) MARK EATON LOL WUT?

Ah, the Ottawa Condom wrappers.

Real talk here, Ottawa. Why is Alfredsson “one of the classiest men in the NHL”? Am i the only person that remembers this? Really?

 

Fucking Garbage.

Glad you never won a cup. Nice fake banners from the cro magnon period, Sens.

Garbage.

ANYWAY!

ON TO THE RECAPPING.

The first period: Whistle Whistle Whistle. Isles Shot. Whistle. Lather rinse repeat.

Second period: Whistle. baack and forth play. Isles power play. Nada. Sens PP. No Sale. Isles PP… Sens Shorty by some guy just before end of period. MOTHERFUCKER. I think i rebroke my toe kicking my desk.

THE FINAL STANZA (MAYBE): MATTYYY (WHO DA MAN, GINA? YOU THE MAN…)….MARTIN! From MV-PA.

Teams trade chances. Another big Isles PK. Tavares and Okposo get posts.

Alfie still a bitch.

To OOOVVERRTTIMME (THE FINAL, FINAL STANZA):

EATON. LOL. EATON. IN HIS 600th GAME. FIRST GOAL IN 121 games. From Jurcina. Backhand spinorama. Of Course! Obvious goal is obvious.

Secondary helper to MV-PA.

ISLES 2, SENS 1 final.

Suck it, Alfie.

 

 

 

Game Recap: Tavares 4, NonJT Isles 1 Canes 2

Hahahahaha.

TO THE RECAPPING!

NEW YORK ISLANDERS @ Team With Flushing Toilet logo that should still be named HARTFORD WHALERS!

The best Flushing Toilet is Cam Ward. I love him. He is Billy Smith II. I hate Eric Staal, and stupid Sutter spawn that Doug Weight knocked out.  Skinner and Faulk are cute, but they play for KIRK PIECE OF SHIT LOWLIFE MUELLER {/Iron_Shiek_Voice}, SO STFU.

TO THE GAME:

MV-PA from Tavares. Powerplay is cash money. Its why Biased NHL wouldnt give us any against stupid Leafs.

Moulson from PA and Streiter. Moneies on the Powerplay.

Carolina roars back on nifty backhgand roofjob and a ridiculous goal where a guy was laying on Pouuuulliinnnn. Stupid Skinner.

Matt Martin staplegunning bitches. Travis Hamonic holds the hammer that says on it ‘Whosoever Holds This Hammer, If He Be Worthy, shall possess the power of the Mighty Thor!”. And Poulin is downright nasty. I love.

2-2 game… getting late, momentum all Flushing Toilets. And then Tavares happens. And then Tavares happens Again. And then Tavares happens again again.

1 helper setting up Okposolypse Now, 2 hammer jobs from N HL’s 4th leading scorer, the Marginally Talented JT91.

Who is third in the league in Game Winning Goals, despite not being clutch as Neil Greenberg explained to us.

Wondrous win.

John Buccigross has referred to Tavares as ‘Filthy Mittens”.

I shall call him “Unmitigated Splendor.”

I leave you with these:

“BAH GOD KING, THAT’s JOHN TAVARES’ MUSIC!”